This is MagicPipe, blogging from an unknown location. The Pilgrims had found me, so I had to go on the run. After posting a picture of their Military Leader, they sent Amish assassins after me. Fourtunately for me though, I scared them away with "Heathen Technology." Scary, right? Then I realized I had to get away, so I took one of the Amish Assassin's Buggies and went on my way. Contrary to what you may believe, my mom did NOT get scared, and did NOT send me to live with my auntie and uncle in Bel-Air. However, the evil forces of Mecha-Stephen Colbert, an evil Doppleganger of the beloved hero Stephen Colbert, did chase me to a currently undisclosed location.
So now it is time to go to war. I will gather my pocket and bellybutton lint army, and wait for volunteers to help me fight the Pilgrims. We're going to take them down. Once and for all. With the help of PENIS, the evil forces of the Pilgrims and their allies, Amish, Decepticons, Republicans, Democrats, the Vatican, the Freemasons, Stonecutters, Mecha-Stephen Colbert, and Fanboys will be destroyed! YAAAAAAAAAAAAAY
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3 comments:
Oh, my fucking GOD.
Brendan, I love you.
Yeah, so. I got a quarter of some crappy bud from a friend. We should totally hang out and get high.
i smoke..... invite me. Btw wth is this about?:" Pilgrims are the sole source of evil in the world." is your made up story or something?
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